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Yesterday I posted a story about some women who verbally attacked me. As I mentioned, I think these women were willing to go to these lengths of nastiness simply to avoid having to admit that they were wrong about anything. And you know what? I’ve met so many people like this. I’ve met people who will give up friendships and jobs and deals and money and even marriages all because they are not capable of admitting they could have possibly been wrong about anything. I’ve watched people lose everything simply because they were unable to utter those little words, “I’m sorry. I was wrong.”
How often do we watch somebody on the freeway, pull a totally ridiculous, dangerous and downright illegal move, and then honk their horn and flip people the finger as they speed away. “Nope, can’t admit I’m wrong,” they think. “Better make sure everybody else knows it’s their own fault.” So they compound the originally dangerous situation with an ever more dangerous situation and put their life as well as the lives of those around them at risk.
What is this all about? Why will we hurt other people and even act outside of our own best interests just to be right about everything? I know that I see it sometimes in myself. Sometimes I will fight for hours or even days against admitting it even when I KNOW down deep that I’m wrong about something. But I’ve learned over the years that as hard as it is to force those dreaded words past my tightly clamped lips, it is the right thing to do. And if I want to have friendships and family relationships and a marriage that works, I have to do it. You can be right ALL the time or you can have friends. You can’t have both. Unless you want to be alone, you have to learn to say it. Let’s practice together now: “I’m sorry, I was wrong.”
There, that wasn’t so hard, was it? Well, no. It’s easy to say those words out of context. But it is good practice for later. Nobody is right all the time–not even me. If we can learn to simply admit it, apologize and move on, the whole world will be a much better place.
Love,
The Fat Chick